i don't know wad i want. i don't know wad i want to do now. i don't know where to go now. i am totally lost! you know wad, i wish that i can get an car accident that can make me lost my memories. then i know no one! isn't that gonna be better for me?? i will forget everyone!! i will forget all the pain and hurts. isn't that good? i just wan to be happy! i don't wan to fake it! i seriously hate myself now! everyday before i sleep, i wish and hope that i can go through this alone. ALONE. but i can't. i really can't! no one will understand me. no one will understand how i feel. NO ONE WILL UNDERSTAND! :'( god, please guide me through this. show me the right path. give me the strength to face this. if possible don't make me be in this kind of situation. i really couldn't face it and i really couldn't take it. its really hard for me. turn the darkness into light, will you? .. invisible tears are the hardest to wipe away!